The last word in the title means wandering (Mania).
I wanted to put megalomania, since there seems to be a profusion of self-important shoppers at Trader Joe's. Perhaps not as many as at Whole Foods, but Whole Foods is more expensive so it just catches the oblivious megalomaniacs without budgetary constraints. Or those (not necessarily megalomaniacs) that just want a tasty muffin. Whole Foods does have better baked goods.
Each time I venture into Trader Joe's it is an exercise of patience. There is only one in New York and it is in the East Village and caters to the NYU student, the die hard artists that have been in the area since the '70's, the senior citizen --- why am I wasting my time stereotyping? You name it any type goes there. The only set requirement is you have to be a little crazy to deal with the craziness. Most times the line is a 20 minute wait that spans a 3/4 perimeter of the store. There are 2 lines: an express for 12 items or less (and they will send you to the back of the other line if you go over -- not that I have seen this happen or that it has happened to me. I have heard the warnings.); and the 'Anything Goes' line. An experienced shopper will get what they can from the center of the store than get on line and shop along the edge while inching toward the cash registers. Both Lines used to parallel the whole way, but yesterday they rerouted the 12 item or less line to the next aisle westward, that which contains organic soaps and toiletries. paper goods, pet food, and syrup and canned goods. I was hoping to snatch some Greek strained 2% yogurt and a box of Trader Joe's Shredded Wheat Cereal, which wouldn't be a problem if the line snaked along its usual path. I debated whether to leave my basket for the 15-20 seconds my go and grab would take. I have seen this happen all the time. And it is common courtesy to let this go, even to take care and push the person in front's basket or cart in their absence. I hemmed and hawed. And then I decided to go. I thought I'd believe in the consideration and understanding of my fellow man. I returned with the cereal and yogurt in the aforementioned time frame only to see that a skinny, pale, dark haired coed with a pixie cut and an Indian man and his white wife in Muslim garb pushing a baby carriage had over stepped my basket. A wonderfully lively black woman in her 50's calmed me with her condemnation over the rudeness displayed. She was outraged on my behalf. I calmly said that it was okay, which it wasn't, that things that go around will come around and I have to feel sorry for their selfish sensibilities. I am not sure if I said that last part. I wish I did. My anger curveted my tongue and I knew I would only be able to safely speak in platitudes. I also wished I would have thanked the lady, my protector, more. I praised her good sense and kindness. As well as hinted at my own. In our discourse I would check to see if any of it was overheard by the rude ones. It didn't seem so. But if I was in their shoes, I would act like I wasn't hearing to avoid confrontation or the obligation of apology.
I know I left the store before the mixed race couple and child. I am not sure about the downtown Laura Flynn Boyle type. I don't care. I suppose it was good to find another considerate soul. But it is upsetting that there were at least three that weren't, and who knows how many behind Milady would have stepped over me? But there is also the unknown of how many chivalrous were behind. It is hard to have the benefit of doubt when the hard numbers show differently. But it was a small random sampling that yielded such numbers and those samplings have a lower accuracy.
The thing that bothers me the most is how does one change bad behavior in another? Even calling it as it is puts the offender on the defensive and so repels any advice or knowledge to mend his ways as arrows in an attack. Then there is the anger that the one affronted feels, and this anger wants blood and aggression. The beast inside must be tamed first and then usually there is no energy or time to tame that in the others.
